Let's talk benders, alcohol and drug fueled benders

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Vutulaki
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Let's talk benders, alcohol and drug fueled benders

Postby Vutulaki » Fri Jul 13, 2018 1:37 pm

Im sitting here watching Joey Diaz's youtube channel (has his own podcast) and he's talking benders with some co-hosts.

Memories come back. I have many but ill share one of my earliest which was my 21st birthday. I had a GF (((first love))) who got me a really nice hotel room, the plan was to go out for a grown up dinner, go out to a club, back to the room, fuck with all bullshit candles lit and whatever..

Well my friends weren't havnig that shit, I fought with the boys every afternoon that week leading up to it. "Fuck off vutu youre not doing that gay shity man, come out with us" yadda yadda ball breaking stuff, of course they were right and I was in love and almost 20 years on I couldnt give a fuck about that bitch or her faggot candles but I still hang with these same guys and love them for what they put me through that weekend.


TBC after I take a shit.

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Jehannum
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Postby Jehannum » Fri Jul 13, 2018 1:48 pm

Vutulaki wrote:Im sitting here watching Joey Diaz's youtube channel (has his own podcast) and he's talking benders with some co-hosts.

Memories come back. I have many but ill share one of my earliest which was my 21st birthday. I had a GF (((first love))) who got me a really nice hotel room, the plan was to go out for a grown up dinner, go out to a club, back to the room, fuck with all bullshit candles lit and whatever..

Well my friends weren't havnig that shit, I fought with the boys every afternoon that week leading up to it. "Fuck off vutu youre not doing that gay shity man, come out with us" yadda yadda ball breaking stuff, of course they were right and I was in love and almost 20 years on I couldnt give a fuck about that bitch or her faggot candles but I still hang with these same guys and love them for what they put me through that weekend.


TBC after I take a shit.

lol your GF was definitely not a keeper, ruining your birthday and your reputation with her dream night

so did your friends give you a load of shit over that weekend or did you actually bail on your GF entirely?

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Vutulaki
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Postby Vutulaki » Fri Jul 13, 2018 2:11 pm

Jehannum wrote:
so did your friends give you a load of shit over that weekend or did you actually bail on your GF entirely?



Thats where this gets good. Being a man of compromise I agreed to my friends giving me a pick me up service on the down low between my overpriced and underappreciated cocktails and poorly shaven 19 year old vag.

Basically I would sneak out/away and get a line of coke, another E tab or smoke a bowl with them throughout the night. She would have to go home the next day due to ultra strict parents and we could party on.

So the night rolls around, my GF is also friends with these guys and I dont have a cell phone so we have to coordinate the last minute details via her phone which made things tricky.

First she takes me to this cabaret restaurant under the Star City casino for a 3 course meal. I tell my fuckheadfriends to start me off with weed so I can eat/function early on before I can blame the booze.

So we're getting ready for the show and dinner and of course it takes me no time to get ready so I tell her im going downstairs for a while to play the slots. Once free I call my mates from a payphone and like clockwork they pull right into where the limousines and shit drop people off at the casino and pick me up in a beat up 1980's Holden Gemini

Image

(^^^ thats a nice version of the car)

We rip around the corner, still in Sydney's bustling CBD on a party night pull up and Im handed a pill. After a few minutes of resistance on my part I take it on their advice which was along the lines of "oh its gonna wear off by the time you go upstairs" (Ecstasy in Australia lasts for up to 4 hours and I knew that).

So these fuckheads start driving me around the city doing nothing really and then bam "Fuck Vutu your missus!" Im guessing its now about 2 hours since I left to "play the slots" "What about her?" "Ive got like 20 missed calls from her dude" Im like you fucking cunts! how long has it been? everyone in the car is off their tits so no one knows. I tell them to drop me at the end of Darling Harbour and ill walk back to the hotel.

Now to give you an idea here is a pic from the balcony of the hotel, I had to walk from the other side of the water on that fucking bridge

Image

Now in the car, music blaring and in the company of these drug fucked demons I felt fine, I took one step out of that car and into the Friday night crowd and felt the E hit me HARD

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Vutulaki
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Postby Vutulaki » Fri Jul 13, 2018 2:22 pm

I snake my way over that bridge through the crowds back in the last days of Sydney being a bloodbath, fight on every corner type city. I guess the point is that it wasnt a pleasant walk thinking of how many dudes in that same vicinity me and my friends had jumped in the months prior and now if confronted by them all I could offer by way of resistance would be a hug.

I make it back but fuck me I cant read now, I have this thing on E where I cant read or make out anything in script so after taking a ride up and down in the lift I fess up to this young couple who got in and they pushed the right button for me while loling their asses off.

So Im back at the hotel, fucked up but walking straight and she says "You look weird"

"Oh fucking Nathan made me drink this absinth shit, like one glass made up of all these different shots"

Yeah not making sense but she was innocent come stupid as they come.

We get downstairs without her getting angry yet so Im gaining my confidence now. The meal arrives and its some fucking salad or entree type shit I turn my nose up to. She starts whining cause this meal alone cost her a few weeks of her strip mall retail assistant job.

Waitress comes up and asks "Would you like to see the wine list?" FUCK YEAH! I order us (me) a bottle of some expensive red and she orders water.

The show starts, now nobody told me these were trannies and I had fuck all hope of working this out myself in that state. Here I am wolf whistling a bunch of fucking men on stage dressed up as women

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Vutulaki
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Postby Vutulaki » Fri Jul 13, 2018 2:30 pm

So now the mains turn up and its a set up where you share a table with other people and everyone gets one of two dishes and swaps if they need to.

First I get into an argument with the guy who asks if I want to swap my steak with his fish, then after I calmed down I look up and the whole table is staring at me while I try to cut my steak up with a fork and spoon. I was using my spoon as a knife.

We continue watching the show and the ex gets up to use the bathroom. I grab her phone and call the boys who tell me to throw as much food out while she's gone as I can.

The waitresses were now clearing tables for dessert so I grab my steak and throw it onto the cart they had in full view of everyone, remember this isnt the early 20's party crowd these are 30-50 year old sitting with us. In go the remnants of my steamed veggies into my wine goblet and it looks like Ive eaten well as long as these fucking geriatrics dont snitch.

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Som-Pong
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Postby Som-Pong » Fri Jul 13, 2018 3:39 pm

L yeah &@%÷#

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Masato
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Postby Masato » Fri Jul 13, 2018 5:33 pm

LOLOL

Become a novela writer, Vutu I will design the art for the covers

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Jehannum
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Postby Jehannum » Fri Jul 13, 2018 10:16 pm

Image

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Canuckster
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Postby Canuckster » Fri Jul 13, 2018 10:57 pm

Jehannum wrote:Image
People say they all want the truth, but when they are confronted with a truth that disagrees with them, they balk at it as if it were an unwanted zombie apocalypse come to destroy civilization.

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Postby Som-Pong » Sat Jul 14, 2018 1:56 am

Makes perfect sense to me.


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